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The Freshman: Game of Love Choices
Chat with them, exchange photos and arrange a date. You may even find the love of your life. We are the alternative to fee-based services and have a strong focus on transparency: All our functions are available free of charge and without restriction for as long as you use the app. Perspective is a funny thing.
I truly wish every child had the opportunity to grow up like I did. We were very family centered. Family came first, second and third. I always felt supported. I always felt loved. My parents worked hard, and they loved harder. We shared a property with both sets of my grandparents at various stages of my youth.
People always ask me how we do that. Everyone always did what they could, when they could.
A Forever Kind of Love
My mom worked two jobs to support my dad, who was also working full-time and attending night school. Then my dad buckled down to take care of my mom when she got sick. And yet, with all those responsibilities, they never missed a game. They never missed a performance. They were always there cheering me on. They all were. I had everything I needed and more. I recently heard that you need to determine 3 types of champions in your life if you want to be successful.
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Your encourager is your eternal cheerleader, your very own pom-pom squad of one. The rock is the most important and the most difficult to find. Your rock loves you no matter what. They just love you for who you are. My parents are my rock. Not in a bad way. I was the first in my family to go away to college, and I went on to earn four undergraduate and three graduate degrees, as well as a traditional MBA. I started pursuing my PhD full time at the University of Maryland while I was also a full time professor at one of the most respected universities on the East Coast.
Plus, I was the proud COO of a rapidly expanding marketing agency. And it almost killed me. I had a really horrific pregnancy and that, along with the stress of all the other positions in my life, landed me in the ICU for six months. Awesome, right? But a few months in the ICU and a ton of rehab to learn to to speak, walk, and talk again has a huge impact on a person. Especially a parent. My kids suffered a great deal in this season.
I was determined to align my purpose and my family. But, typically, I wake up around am. Hal Elrod is a dear friend of mine and absolutely changed my parenting journey with this practice. Practice what you preach, right? First, I get still. I spend a few minutes just taking truly deep breaths and remind myself just how thankful I am for functioning lungs.
Then I drink water. I drink that water EVERY morning to remind myself just how truly momentous that first sip was after months being so thirsty. This used to feel SO silly to me. Then, I get my body moving. This is super important with post-ICU related injuries. Then I spend at least 15 minutes reading. I love reading. LOVE it. I used to constantly read productivity books hello, workaholic , but now I read parenting books or books on relationships.
Once my timer goes off, I journal for about 5 minutes. Now, this might seem counter-intuitive, but around this time I actually go back to bed. So, we usually snuggle up under the covers and read a story or talk about our intentions for the day. It allows me to connect with them in such a profound way and is incredibly grounding. It also allows them to wake up each morning gently… easing them into the day surrounded by love and support.
Every day as an entrepreneur looks different. We come home, do homework together, and play outside from about 3— This has been a great time for me to really get my body moving, because my little guys are anything but lethargic. Then we have dinner together pretty faithfully as a family at 6pm. Our highs, our lows, our failures and our wins. My hubby puts the kids to bed at , which is amazing because it gives them consistent, quality Dad time and it allows me to catch anything that fell through the cracks with work or came in after 3pm.
I also delegate a lot. I stay in my lane. Usually sitting on the back porch with a glass of wine, catching up on our day, and staying connected. And can I be honest for a minute? Sometimes even 9. I turn into a pumpkin. If I go more than two nights in a row with less than eight hours of sleep I start to feel it physically, in my body. Not to mention what it does to me mentally and emotionally. I run on sleep and snuggles.
This is probably intuitive to many, but it would be beneficial to spell it out. Based on your experience or research, can you flesh out why not spending time with your children can be detrimental to their development? Children are going to learn. For any of it. I was in the ICU. We were incredibly blessed by my sister who swooped in and took my two babies in as if they were her own. She loved on them, made them feel seen and heard, and kept them in the most stable and loving environment possible.
She is an absolute Angel. And yet we are still suffering the consequences of that time apart. On the flip side, can you give a few reasons or examples about why it is so important to make time to spend with your children? When I came home and rejoined my kids, I had to make up for that lost time. We literally spent every waking moment together for more than a year. They were physically attached to me if we were out one tied to my front and one to the back… babywearing is magical.
I was the last thing they saw before their eyes closed and the first thing they saw when they woke in the morning. I had to fight hard for their trust. But it was so worth it. According to this study cited in the Washington Post, the quality of time spent with children is more important than the quantity of time. Can you give a 3—5 stories or examples from your own life about what you do to spend quality time with your children? Oh, man. You can spend all day with your kiddos and experience NO quality time with them. Deep down your kids just want you. I struggle in the discipline arena.
My gut reaction is to protect my children from anything that may hurt them. Trust is a priceless commodity that is not easily earned and very easily broken. My kids and I have been down that path already. I hope that my unwavering commitment to our relationship NOW conveys a sense of worth and security as my kids go through the different seasons of life.
We all live in a world with many deadlines and incessant demands for our time and attention. Can you share with our readers 5 strategies about how we can create more space in our lives in order to give our children more quality attention? This used to be so, incredibly difficult for me. Essentially a professor takes a mason jar and then fills it with two-inch rocks.
He asks the class if the jar is full? Yes, they agree. The professor then pours a box of pebbles into the jar and they roll into the open areas between the rocks. Again, he asks if the jar is full. The students chuckle and agree that, yes, this time it is full. But the professor then begins to pour a handful of sand into the jar. The sand trickles in and fills the space between the pebbles.
You have preferences? No problem!
My gift? There were no rocks. There were no pebbles. No sand or water. I was in the ICU on life support, being read my final rights.
Dorothy Maclean - Choices of Love - Floris Books
My jar was empty. I had to make a decision. I worked HARD. First at not dying.